Worst Movies of 2015

Here are my Top 10 Worst Movies for 2015:

get-hard-movie-poster

10.  GET HARD – ** – Unfunny comedy with Will Ferrell and Kevin Hart.  There was a time when I used to enjoy Will Ferrell movies.  Been a while.

9. PROJECT ALMANAC – ** – a group of teens build a time machine.  After a light start, this silly science fiction movie tries to become a serious thriller but collapses under the weight of its own pretensions.

8. INSIDIOUS CHAPTER 3 – ** – third entry in the INSIDIOUS series is the weakest yet.  I’m also just not that into prequels.

7. JUPITER ASCENDING – **- colorful but utterly preposterous tale of an intergalactic princess (Mila Kunis) seeking her birthright, with ramifications that will affect the entire universe!  Yeah, right.

jupiter ascending

6. THE LAZARUS EFFECT – * 1/2- This modern day Frankenstein tale of scientists attempting to resurrect the dead has its heart in the right place—heh heh—but is undone by a very weak story.  There’s no resurrecting this movie.

5. SAN ANDREAS- * 1/2-  a silly disaster film starring Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson as a chopper pilot who flies all over California— at the expense of the people he’s supposed to be rescuing, I might add!— in order to save his family from a deadly earthquake.  Is that Charlton Heston and George Kennedy I see?  This one is as bad as the epic of all bad disaster movies, EARTHQUAKE (1974).  At least that one had Sensurround!

This one is so bad not even the presence of Paul Giamatti as a scientist can save it.  Yet another story about an estranged married couple who have to put aside their differences in order to save their children from some extraordinary catastrophe.  Sorry, but if you couldn’t make it work during normal times, what makes you think you can do it during an earthquake?  Ugh!

4. SINISTER 2 – * 1/2-  This is as weak and tepid a horror sequel as you can get.  The saddest part of the whole thing is that the SINISTER movies have in them a really cool monster/demon, Bughuul, and sadly he’s not used to his potential in either movie.

Also, in this series, Bughuul makes children both kill their families and film the murder.  The original film had the murders taking place in the past, and so it made sense when the main character uncovered old 8mm films of the murders.  Here, the sequel takes place in the present day, yet the possessed children are still using film cameras to record their crimes.  Wouldn’t they just use a Smartphone or a Tablet?

A silly horror movie sequel, not worth your time.

3. 50 SHADES OF GREY- * 1/2-  This one should have been called 50 SHADES OF BLAH.  Talk about being dull and boring.  As tedious as the films in the TWILIGHT series.  Dakota Johnson is completed wasted in the role of Anastasia Steele.

Also, for a film that is supposed to be graphic and sexual  it’s about as tame as graphic and sexual can be.  I’ve seen more risqué stuff on Benny Hill.

2.TED 2 – * – This is probably the only film of the year that I hated.   While I enjoyed the first TED movie somewhat, I thought this one was a complete waste of time.  Nothing here for anyone over the age of 12.  Juvenile, tasteless, and worst of all, not very funny.  Its idea of humor is to have Mark Wahlberg and Ted sneak into Tom Brady’s bedroom in order to steal his sperm.  Three guesses on how they plan to do it, and the first two don’t count.  Oh, yeah, that’s funny!  No.  It’s flat out weird.

ted 2

1.THE GALLOWS – * – I wish my pick for the worst movie of the year wasn’t a horror movie, but alas, it is.  How dumb is this one?  Well, the main plot point is that in honor of the 20th anniversary of a high school play gone wrong— a student was accidentally hanged to death on stage- the school decides to put on the same play again.  Duh!  Needless to say, someone isn’t very happy about this decision, and once again more students turn up dead.  Unfortunately none of them were responsible for the script.

gallows poster

And that’s my list of the Worst Movies of 2015.

Thanks for reading!

—Michael

 

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2 thoughts on “Worst Movies of 2015

  1. It seems like modern Horror movies come with great concepts and horrible execution… We appear to have a gap in our quality control and yet the good news is, so many of us keep trying to like these bad new Horror films…it means Horror still has a solid fan base…a bored one, but a fan base. Somebody loose the Kraken!

  2. I agree. Some of the lower budget independent horror films which don’t get wide releases are actually better, which makes me wonder how it is that they don’t make it to the theaters.

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