GODZILLA X KONG: THE NEW EMPIRE (2024): Silly Giant Monster Bash Doesn’t Take Itself Too Seriously

As you know, I am a huge King Kong and Godzilla fan, having grown up watching and enjoying the Kong and Godzilla movies of yesteryear.

As you also know, I have not been a fan of the recent American versions of the Godzilla and King Kong movies. Films like GODZILLA: KING OF THE MONSTERS (2019) and GODZILLA VS. KONG (2021), to name a couple, just haven’t worked for me. I know there are those of you who subscribe to the belief that any King Kong or Godzilla movie is a good thing, because it’s better than not having movies made about these monsters. I completely disagree with this notion. A bad movie is a bad movie, and the fact that fans may love it, doesn’t turn it into a good one.

And these recent Godzilla and King Kong films have been bad movies. They’ve featured bad writing, with awful dialogue, boring characters, and ridiculous storylines, and the CGI special effects just don’t capture the magic of the old-fashioned man in suit effects from the Toho Godzilla movies or the stop-motion animation of the original KING KONG (1933). I always feel like I’m watching a cartoon rather than a real movie. This is difficult for me to say, because I love monster movies, especially giant monster movies. But these recent Godzilla/King Kong movies haven’t been doing monster movie fans many favors.

Which brings us to today’s movie, GODZILLA X KONG: THE NEW EMPIRE (2024), reuniting Kong and Godzilla once again, this time to fight against a new enemy.

Again, a ridiculous plot. However… after watching this new monster movie bash, having gone in with very low expectations, I have to say that… I liked this one a little bit better than the previous ones!

The main reason I liked GODZILLA X KONG: THE NEW EMPIRE a tad bit better is that it didn’t take itself as seriously as the previous movies, which tried so hard to be taken seriously. They were filled with ultra serious characters speaking in ultra serious monster movie cliches. Here, the tone is much lighter, and the human characters are often humorous.

Once again, we have a completely ludicrous plot, a poor excuse just to put giant monsters in a movie. After the events of the previous installment, Kong now lives in a world underneath the Earth, and he’s monitored by a corporation which actually monitors all the giant monsters on the Earth. Scientist Ilene Andrews (Rebecca Hall) is closest to Kong, mostly because her deaf daughter Jia (Kaylee Hottle) has the ability to communicate with Kong.

The plot in a nutshell: Kong discovers an underground civilization of giant apes and native humans, who send out a distress call as they are about to be attacked by another creature which lives underground. Godzilla hears the distress call and makes his way towards it, and eventually he and Kong put aside their differences to defend the Earth from this new threat.

Not exactly Oscar winning material!

In order to have some dialogue in the film, humans also get in on the action, so Ilene, Jia, conspiracy blogger Bernie Hayes (Brian Tyree Henry), and giant monster veterinarian (yup, you heard me right) Trapper (Dan Stevens) also travel to middle earth.

It’s Trapper and Bernie who provide much of the comic relief in this one, and they are quite funny. It helps to have an actor like Dan Stevens in the role, and he provides just the right balance of over-the-top personality with some well-timed sincerity.

Rebecca Hall, Kaylee Hottle, and Brian Tyree Henry all reprise their roles from the previous movie, GODZILLA VS. KONG. As I said, Brian Tyree Henry as Bernie is funny throughout, and Rebecca Hall in the lead role plays a likable and sensible character who is good at making the unbelievable sound believable. The human cast is quite good here, and they are a big reason why I liked this one a little bit better.

But you don’t see a KING KONG/GODZILLA movie for the human cast. You see it for the monsters. Although once again, I thought the CGI effects were way too cartoonish, there were some moments where the effects looked impressive, like close-ups of Kong’s mouth sporting an infected tooth. The facial expressions on Kong and the apes were also quite good.

This is also much more of a Kong movie than a Godzilla movie. Kong is in this one throughout, while Godzilla only appears fleetingly. So, hardcore Godzilla fans may be disappointed. Although they may be happy to hear that Mothra makes a brief guest appearance.

Director Adam Wingard at least keeps this one under two hours. So, the foolishness of the proceedings don’t drag on too long. The monster battles are actually nothing to write home about here, and I thought fell rather flat.

The silly screenplay was written by Terry Rossio, Simon Barrett, and Jeremy Slater, and it features a story as ridiculous as you can imagine. The dialogue this time around wasn’t filled with cliches, and the human characters actually entertained somewhat, both good things.

GODZILLA X KONG: THE NEW EMPIRE doesn’t take itself too seriously, and the silliness of the whole thing is embraced, and it seemed as if the filmmakers knew what kind of movie they were making. But even on this level the film could have been better. While I enjoyed some of the humor, it certainly wasn’t the sharpest writing on the planet, or even in the middle of the planet! The writing and the humor are average at best, but average is better than horrible.

And this is why I enjoyed GODZILLA X KONG: THE NEW EMPIRE a tad more than the previous installments. It’s a silly monster movie that knows it’s silly. On the other hand, while goofy giant monster movies can be fun, they don’t hold a candle to serious giant monster movies like the recent Oscar winning GODZILLA MINUS ONE (2023). Movies like GODZILLA MINUS ONE lift the genre and are truly remarkable special films that deserve high praise and continued recognition.

Unlike movies like GODZILLA X KONG: THE NEW EMPIRE which aren’t anything more than a quick diversion and offer little to anyone who’s not a giant monster movie fan.

As such, I give GODZILLA X KONG: THE NEW EMPIRE two and a half stars.

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RATING SYSTEM

Four stars – Perfect, Top of the line

Three and a half stars- Excellent

Three stars – Very Good

Two and a half stars – Good

Two Stars – Fair

One and a half stars – Pretty Weak

One star- Poor

Zero stars – Awful

Top 10 Worst Movies of 2023

Here is my list of the top 10 worst movies I saw in 2023. These are the films that for various reasons simply did not work for me. And then some!

10. MISSING (2023) – **

Coming in at #10 is MISSING, a silly thriller about a teen girl using the internet to locate her missing mom. A sequel of sorts to SEARCHING (2018) and featuring the same gimmicky online plot points, this one’s not as good as that 2018 film because its story becomes super contrived and rather stupid.

9. SALTBURN (2023) – **

Based on all the hype this movie received, I’m guessing it’s probably on a lot of folks’ Top 10 best lists, but this stylish thriller by writer/director Emerald Fennell just didn’t work for me. It’s a strange hybrid of a movie, part comedy, part thriller, and eventually a full-blown horror movie. Would have worked much better as a sharp satire. Instead, it becomes a horror film where the victims are the ultra-rich and the violent killer the hero. Weird and ugly stuff.

8. JESUS REVOLUTION (2023) – **

If religion to you is a slice of white bread, you’ll love JESUS REVOLUTION, a drama based on a true story of the spiritual awakening of a group of hippies in the 1970s. It means well and features a solid performance by Kelsey Grammer as a preacher who because of dwindling attendance at his church opens his doors to the youthful hippies and suddenly his church begins to flourish. The point of the story is open your church doors to people who are different, and your church will grow, but the problem is everyone in this story looks and acts the same. Marketed to those who are already religious, with little to offer for anyone outside its target audience.

7. YOU PEOPLE (2023) – **

A variation of GUESS WHO’S COMING TO DINNER, this Netflix movie misfire stars Jonah Hill and Lauren London as a racially mixed couple who before they get married decide to bring their parents together so they can all be on board with the relationship, which of course, they are not. In spite of a supporting cast which includes Eddie Murphy, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, and David Duchovny, this supposed comedy just isn’t very funny. The laughs are labored, the story trite.

6. COCAINE BEAR (2023) – * 1/2

So many people loved COCAINE BEAR, but this silly horror movie comedy by director Elizabeth Banks for me failed to be scary or funny. It’s bloody and violent, but this doesn’t translate into scares or laughs. Loosely based on a true story (in real life the bear that ate the cocaine died. Obviously!) where a bear ingests cocaine and goes on a rampage in the woods while drug dealers try to recover their lost merchandise, and innocent people in the way of both fight for their lives. The situations, characters, and dialogue are all ripe to be very funny, but the script by Jimmy Warden simply isn’t up to the task.

5. HYPNOTIC (2023) – * 1/2

One of the most ridiculous movies of the year, this thriller by writer/director Robert Rodriquez stars Ben Affleck as a police detective— and Affleck is doing his best Batman shtick here in a movie where he’s not playing Batman!— trying to locate his missing daughter. He’s helped by a psychic as they pursue a mysterious hypnotist in a plot where things are simply not as they seem. The big reveal is big time ridiculous.

4. THE MACHINE (2023) – * 1/2

One of my least favorite movies of the year. A cinematic vehicle for shirtless comedian Bert Kreischer, otherwise known as the Machine. Nuff said. Except there’s more: Mark Hamill shows up playing Bert’s father and gives this forgettable comedy its best moments. Okay. Now, nuff said!

3. FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDY’S (2023) – *

Pretty awful horror movie, based on the immensely popular video game series. Only saving grace are the animatronic special effects by Jim Henson’s Creature Shop, but these effects and creatures aren’t used in the movie nearly enough.

2. MEG 2; THE TRENCH (2023) – *

I generally love Jason Statham movies, but this sequel to a decent Jason Statham movie was flat out horrendous. Completely unbelievable, featuring a ridiculous story, awful dialogue, and situations which are insulting to intelligent moviegoers the world over.

1. THE LAKE (2023) – 0 stars

By far, THE LAKE was the worst movie I saw in 2023. This giant monster movie from Thailand was so bad its script had the level of writing you’d expect to be generated by an AI writer. The dialogue pretty much narrates the proceedings, as characters speak about what they are doing while they are doing it. Let’s rescue these people. We are now rescuing these people. We have rescued these people. It’s that bad. It’s so awful, it’s difficult to believe just how awful it is. You are welcome to check it out for yourself, but I can think of far better uses of your time and better movies to enjoy than this one.

Okay, there you have it. My list of the Top 10 Worst Movies from 2023.

Now I’m off to see some more movies here in 2024.

As always, thanks for reading.

—Michael

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Top 10 Best Movies of 2023

Here is my list of my Top 10 favorite movies from 2023.

Per usual, there are some surprises. Some of my picks are well known, while others are films that were lesser received, but I really liked. Here we go:

10. MOVING ON (2022) – *** 1/2

Coming in at #10 is the lesser known of the Jane Fonda/Lily Tomlin pairings this year. While all the hype went to 80 FOR BRADY (2023), I really enjoyed this comedy drama in which Fonda and Tomlin play former best friends reunited at their friend’s funeral, after which Fonda declares she is going to murder their deceased friend’s husband, played by Malcolm McDowell. The reason? She claims he sexually assaulted her years before, an accusation he denies, claiming their encounter was mutual. A deliciously dark comedy that is both very funny and serious, as it tackles the subject of sexual assault. Fonda and Tomlin both enjoy memorable moments in this one, especially as they try to commit murder.

9. BIG GEORGE FOREMAN (2023) – *** 1/2

Sure, I’m a sucker for boxing movies, but this bio pic of boxer George Foreman has such an incredible true story to tell, it’s difficult not to love. And that’s because Foreman defied the odds not once, but twice, becoming heavyweight champion at two very different times in his life. It’s also a story of faith, since Foreman became a minister along the way, but the film doesn’t overplay its religious hand. Features an outstanding performance by Khris Davis as George Foreman in the lead role, and also one of Forest Whitaker’s best performances in years as Foreman’s trainer, Doc Broadus. Boxing was never more exciting than during the era of Joe Frazier, Muhammad Ali, and George Foreman in the early 1970s, and this film tells Foreman’s side of the story.

8. RUSTIN (2023) – *** 1/2

Colman Domingo gives one of the best performances of the year as Civil Rights leader Bayard Rustin, the man who organized the Freedom March on Washington D.C. where Martin Luther King Jr. delivered his “I have a dream” speech. Rustin, who was gay, had to deal with both racism and homophobia, and was persecuted for both. The film is both a sympathetic character study and an historical drama as it chronicles everything that went into getting the March to happen, and according to the movie, it wouldn’t have happened without Rustin. One of Netflix’s best original movies of the year.

7. THE BURIAL (2023) – *** 1/2

I loved this Amazon Prime original drama based on the true story of a funeral home director Jeremiah O’Keefe (Tommy Lee Jones) who hires flashy TV lawyer Willie Gary (Jamie Foxx) to represent him as he tries to fend off a huge conglomerate that wants to steal his family business. It’s important to Jeremiah because he’s about to retire, and his business is the only thing he has to leave to his family; and he doesn’t like being bullied. The film tackles racism and greed and features a terrific performance by Jamie Foxx.

6. PAIN HUSTLERS (2023) – *** 1/2

Another movie that tackles greed, this Netflix original movie stars Emily Blunt as Liza Drake, a desperate single mom struggling to survive and care for her teenage daughter. When she gets hired by a pharmaceutical firm, she discovers that she is really good at prescription drug sales, and her work saves the company. She is suddenly making more money than she ever dreamed of, and all is well, until she realizes that the company she works for and the doctors she sells to are only in it for the money and overprescribe their cancer medications even to patients who don’t need it or who will be harmed by it. All in the name of making money. Blunt is terrific as always. The cast also includes Chris Evans as a fast-talking sales manager who is miles away from Evans’ Captain America persona, and Andy Garcia makes for quite the eccentric villain here. Also features Catherine O’Hara in a fun performance as Liza’s opportunistic yet always caring mother.

5. GODZILLA MINUS ONE (2023)- ***1/2

Easily the best horror movie of the year, GODZILLA MINUS ONE is also one of the best Godzilla movies ever made. With the exception of the 1954 original, it’s certainly the scariest. Writer/director Takashi Yamazaki creates real characters with real conflicts and sticks them in the middle of a showdown with Godzilla, while including social commentary on Japan’s vulnerable condition after World War II, making this period piece giant monster movie one for the ages. The best giant monster movie since CLOVERFIELD (2008).

4. OPPENHEIMER (2023) – *** 1/2

The movie I was looking forward to most in 2023, and this one certainly did not disappoint. Christopher Nolan’s bio pic of atomic bomb creator J. Robert Oppenheimer is a masterpiece, which is no surprise, since masterpieces pretty much are Nolan’s standard for filmmaking. He’s one of the best. The movie’s message is chilling as it speaks to the dangers of atomic and nuclear weapons, weapons that today still threaten our planet. Cillian Murphy is outstanding as Oppenheimer, and he leads an all-star cast which includes Emily Blunt, Matt Damon, and Robert Downey Jr., who is particularly memorable as the two-faced Lewis Strauss.

3. POOR THINGS (2023) – ****

Emma Stone gives the best performance of her career so far— certainly the deepest, boldest, and most daring performance she has ever given— as Bella, a woman with the mind of an infant who leaves home and learns the ways of the world, and she uses her innocence and naivete to empower her to move beyond the men who want to dominate and control her. This fantasy tale by director Yorgos Lanthimos is so impressive it transcends its material. Visually stunning and featuring knockout performances by Emma Stone, Willem Dafoe, and Mark Ruffalo, POOR THINGS speaks to a woman’s right to control her own body. Its story, while bizarre, is easy to follow and accessible, the storytelling clear and concise.

2. BARBIE (2023) – ****

I was all set to call BARBIE the most creative movie of the year, but it shares that honor with the aforementioned POOR THINGS. Nonetheless, BARBIE is a marvel of modern filmmaking by writer/director Greta Gerwig. A celebration of womanhood, the script by Gerwig and Noah Baumbach is exceedingly clever. It’s a fantasy, a comedy, it’s fun, and yet it has so much to say about being a woman. Margot Robbie nails it as Barbie, while Kate McKinnon steals all her scenes as Weird Barbie. It’s a deep resonating story disguised as a colorful, light, fun fantasy, which it is, but there is so much going on here, so much to take in. And the genius of this movie is even with its multiple layers of meaning and overall depth, it will sell more Barbie dolls than had it been a simple fantasy tale about a toy.

1. HUNGER (2023) – ****

My favorite movie from 2023 may come as a surprise, but it’s a little-known Netflix-original movie called HUNGER. A thriller which hails from Thailand, HUNGER is reminiscent of the movie, THE MENU (2022), which starred Ralph Fiennes and Anya Taylor-Joy, in that both movies are about food and feature a domineering abusive chef, but that’s where the similarities end. The story told in HUNGER is completely different than the one told in THE MENU, and it’s a much better story. It’s about a young woman who cooks for her family’s struggling restaurant, when she gets the opportunity to train with and work for a world-renowned chef. While she works her way up the ranks, she sees firsthand how cut-throat and domineering the chef is, yet she refuses to allow him to break her will. The story has a lot to say about social economic standings, and how the rich treat the poor. The story only gets more intriguing as we learn about the chef’s background and why he does what he does, and when the young woman needs to return home to help her ailing dad but doesn’t want to because success is within her grasp, and she doesn’t want to walk away from it. Everything about this movie clicks. The writing and directing are both superb, and the acting performances exceptional. There isn’t one ounce of fat on this one.

HUNGER was my favorite movie from 2023.

Well, I hope you enjoyed today’s column. Next week I will share my picks for the Top 10 worst movies from 2023.

Thanks for reading!

—Michael

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GODZILLA MINUS ONE (2023) – Superior Godzilla Movie Showcases Cinematic Storytelling at Its Best

GODZILLA MINUS ONE (2023) is being hailed by some fans and critics as the best Godzilla movie ever made.

It could be.

That’s a huge boast, considering that this is the 37th time the King of the Monsters, Godzilla, has stomped his way through a movie. And Godzilla really is the king of the monsters, or at least of the giant monsters. I mean, I love King Kong, and he’s my personal favorite giant monster, but in terms of cinematic significance, staying power, and sheer numbers, there’s no comparison. Godzilla is king.

And whether or not GODZILLA MINUS ONE is the best Godzilla movie ever made or not (more on this later), the key point here is that it’s an incredibly well-made movie, the most intense giant monster movie since CLOVERFIELD (2008). I loved it.

GODZILLA MINUS ONE features some of the most thrilling and cinematic Godzilla scenes ever put on film, and it takes its time creating memorable characters, so when they are put in harm’s way, the Godzilla sequences become that much more frightening.

GODZILLA MINUS ONE takes place in the mid 1940s, making it a period piece, in the years when Japan was struggling to rebuild after the devastation of World War II. It’s interesting to note that the events in this movie take place nearly a decade before the events depicted in the original GODZILLA (1954). The movie opens with Kamakazi pilot Shikishima (Ryunosuke Kamiki) taking refuge on Odo Island to get his plane repaired. The lead mechanic there Tachibana (Munetaka Aoki) tells Shikishima that there’s nothing wrong with his plane, which introduces the main conflict in Shikishima’s life, that he ran away from his suicide mission, and the guilt and shame he feels because of it.

Now, Odo Island should sound familiar to Godzilla fans, as it’s the fictional island where Godzilla first appeared the original Godzilla movie, and guess what? It’s where he shows up for the first time in this movie! And it’s up to Shikishima to shoot and kill the monster, and once again he fails. When he awakes, he finds everyone on the island dead except for himself and Tachibana, who calls him a coward for not taking the shot to kill Godzilla, and he tells Shikishima that all this blood is on his hands.

Back in Japan, Shikishima finds all his family has died, and in the midst of living in guilt and shame, he meets Oishi (Minami Hamabe) a young woman who had rescued a baby, and the three of them form an unlikely family unit. When Shikishima takes a job on a boat to locate and destroy underwater mines, he becomes friends with its small crew.

Later, when Godzilla resurfaces, now as a much larger and more powerful creature and attacks Japan, the broken nation finds itself without a defense. Its military is depleted, and the United States refuses to help in fear that any military maneuvers in the Pacific could escalate tensions with the Soviet Union. So, it’s the private citizens who have to take matters into their own hands, with Shikishima and his mine crew taking on a central role in the battle against Godzilla, which sets up Shikishima’s story arc, as he tries to protect his new family and friends, determined to make the ultimate sacrifice to destroy Godzilla and by doing so give a future to his family, friends, and the people of Japan.

It’s a terrific story. One of the best from any Godzilla movie.

GODZILLA MINUS ONE was written and directed by Takashi Yamazaki, and while this is his first Godzilla movie, he’s an award-winning writer/director who’s been making movies for over twenty years. And that’s one of the biggest positives of GODZILLA MINUS ONE. It’s exceedingly cinematic and possesses the fine strokes of a master moviemaker and storyteller.

The Godzilla scenes in this movie are the among best in the entire series. They’re exciting, feature characters you care about in harm’s way, and are shot and framed by Takashi Yamazaki to full effect. The movie also makes full and dramatic use of the original Godzilla music theme during these sequences.

The climactic sequence where the citizens make their last stand against Godzilla is one of the series’ best. The only sequence which supersedes it is Godzilla’s attack on Tokyo in the original Godzilla, which remains one of the all-time best sequences in any giant monster movie— in any horror movie— period.

One drawback here is the finale in GODZILLA MINUS ONE is rather derivative of the finale in Christopher Nolan’s DUNKIRK (2017). While it didn’t get in the way of my enjoyment of this part of the movie, while watching it, with the ships, the tugboats manned by the citizens, the plane zooming above, I couldn’t help but think of the similar climactic scene in Nolan’s World War II movie.

There were other drawbacks as well. While the movie took great care to develop its characters, a lot of this time spent on them got in the way of the movie’s pacing. When Godzilla is not on screen, things aren’t very intense. This is by design, because when Godzilla is not in the movie, characters, at least not until the end, aren’t really talking about him. They’re talking about Japan.

This movie could have been titled JAPAN MINUS ONE. Of course, that wouldn’t have sold as many tickets. But the title GODZILLA MINUS ONE refers to how low Japan was after World War II, and the emergence of Godzilla put the nation into a minus. So, for the most part, these characters are thinking about rebuilding their lives, and in Shikishima’s case, he’s still living the war because of what he perceives to be the shame of his actions. This is all solid drama, but that being said, this is also a Godzilla movie, and when Godzilla is not on screen, in terms of a Godzilla movie, it’s a tad slow.

I also can’t say that I loved the look of Godzilla in this one. At times he looked sufficiently ferocious, but there was something fake looking about him in many of his ocean appearances.

But these are minor quibbles. Again, I loved this movie!

So, do I think it’s the best Godzilla movie ever made? No. The original GODZILLA remains the best for me. I still find that movie so disturbing that it’s difficult to watch. Even the Raymond Burr Americanized version of that film has its moments. The attack on Tokyo, and the symbolism of Godzilla in light of the atomic bomb blasts, makes that movie a horror film for the ages.

The Godzilla films which followed became more and more fun, and to be certain, for me, all the Toho Godzilla movies of the 1960s and 70s are guilty pleasures. I enjoy all of them. When Toho continued the series in the 1990s and 2000s, they became a tad more serious, but they were also less fun, except for GODZILLA, MOTHRA AND KING GHIDORAH: GIANT MONSTERS ALL-OUT ATTACK (2001), better known among fans as GMK, which in spite of its mouthful of a title is a superior Godzilla movie and up until today my second favorite Godzilla movie.

I haven’t really enjoyed any of the recent American Godzilla movies, and Toho’s previous entry, SHIN GODZILLA (2016), which was quite critically acclaimed, was a bit too cerebral for my tastes. It lacked emotion.

That’s not the case here with GODZILLA MINUS ONE. Emotions run high throughout. The characters’ stories are the main focus here and do not take a back seat to Godzilla.

GODZILLA MINUS ONE is a superior giant monster movie, a superb horror movie, and probably my second favorite Godzilla movie after the original.

As such, I give it three and a half stars.

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RATING SYSTEM

Four stars – Perfect, Top of the line

Three and a half stars- Excellent

Three stars – Very Good

Two and a half stars – Good

Two Stars – Fair

One and a half stars – Pretty Weak

One star- Poor

Zero stars – Awful

PICTURE OF THE DAY: KING KONG (1976)

Today we actually have two pictures of the day, as we take a look at some images from KING KONG (1976), the first remake of the 1933 classic, a film that bombed at the box office upon its initial release and was pretty much destroyed by critics and fans alike. But the 1976 KING KONG is one of those movies that has gotten better with age, and today looking back it’s easier to see that it has some good things going for it, including arguably the best Kong’s first entrance scene in any King Kong movie, dramatically shot and framed by director John Guillermin.

But that’s not to say the movie isn’t without its problems. It was much maligned back in 1976, and for good reason. One faux pas was the producer’s unabashed boast that KING KONG would be better than JAWS (1975) which came out the year before, a boast that fell well-short of expectations.

Another boast was that the special effects team, under the direction of Carlo Rambaldi, was building a life-sized giant mechanical robot of Kong that would serve as the centerpiece of the film’s special effects. Who needs stop-motion animation or a man in an ape suit if you could have a life-sized Kong doing all his own stunts?

Well, it was built all right, but it never worked. And with the exception of one brief scene, it’s not featured in the movie. Instead, almost exclusively Kong was portrayed by Rick Baker in an ape suit. Now, Rick Baker, as he has done throughout his career, did a remarkable job with the make-up and the suit, and his Kong is excellent. Close-ups of his face make him one of the most authentic looking Kongs of all time.

But back in 1976 it didn’t matter because audiences felt duped because they had been told they would be seeing a gigantic mechanical Kong, not a man in a suit. And in a sad attempt to prevent this secret from being known, the producers largely ignored Rick Baker’s contributions to this movie and heavily promoted Carlo Rambaldi as having created Kong in this film.

The actual mechanical gizmo created by Rambaldi truthfully doesn’t look half bad. The problem was in the movie it never moved except for some obviously slow and fake looking arm and eye motions. Baker, on the other hand, looked outstanding. He also moved.

Take a look for yourself. In the first picture above, that’s the robot. In the picture below it, it’s Rick Baker. As you can see, the robot looks pretty darn good, but without motion, it also looks pretty darn fake. It’s also difficult to fully appreciate Baker’s performance as Kong just from one still image, but in a movie that has aged well, Baker’s performance and Kong costume have become one of the 1976’s versions biggest stars.

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IN THE SPOOKLIGHT: THE VALLEY OF GWANGI (1969)

I love Ray Harryhausen movies.

Then again, who doesn’t? They’re awesome!

However, today’s IN THE SPOOKLIGHT feature, THE VALLEY OF GWANGI (1969) is not one of Harryhausen’s best. It also tanked at the box office.

Its tale of cowboys vs. dinosaurs can be traced back to Harryhausen’s mentor, Willis H. O’Brien, who had the idea shortly after he completed the stop-motion effects on KING KONG (1933). O’Brien’s plans to make the movie were eventually scrapped, but he was able to insert the cowboys vs. monster theme in MIGHTY JOE YOUNG (1949), as cowboys in Africa attempted to lasso Mr. Joe Young, the monstrous gorilla in the film, which was also the first movie on which Ray Harryhausen worked, as O’Brien’s protege. Harryhausen did most of the animation work in the movie.

O’Brien tried again with the cowboys vs. dinosaur story in the 1950s, but he eventually had to leave the project, and the movie, THE BEAST OF HOLLOW MOUNTAIN (1956), was made without him; the result a film with horribly inferior special effects.

Ten years later, Ray Harryhausen borrowed the idea and made a much better movie than THE BEAST OF HOLLOW MOUNTAIN, which isn’t saying much, but that movie was THE VALLEY OF GWANGI.

I’m on record as saying that a Ray Harryhausen movie with inferior special effects doesn’t exist, because Harryhausen always brought his A game to the movies he worked on. And I stand by that statement. That being said, I will concede that the final stop-motion results in THE VALLEY OF GWANGI fall into the A- category. Harryhausen’s work is always smooth and impressive, but two things get in the way of success here. One, the main dinosaur in this movie, a very hungry Allosaurus, changes color throughout the film, and also in many scenes just doesn’t seem all that large or menacing, which is the biggest knock against this movie. The dinosaur just isn’t very frightening. Compared to Harryhausen’s creation in THE BEAST FROM 20,000 FATHOMS (1953), the colorful Allosaurus seems like a Disney attraction.

All this being said, I still like THE VALLEY OF GWANGI. Very much. I’m just conceding that it’s not quite as good as some of Harryhausen’s other movies.

THE VALLEY OF GWANGI takes place in Mexico in the early 1900s, where T. J. (Gila Golan) runs a struggling wild west show, and much to her chagrin, her former lover, Tuck Kirby (James Franciscus) shows up, having left her years earlier. Tuck is a free spirit, a showman, who is always looking for the next best thing. and he’s there to try to help T.J. with her show. She wants no part of him, and she is encouraged to keep her distance from him by Champ Connors (Richard Carlson), who not only works for T.J., but looks after her, having promised her deceased father years earlier that he would do just that.

But when T.J. and Tuck discover a hidden valley in the desert in which dinosaurs live, they manage to capture an Allosaurus, and they decide— of course— to bring it back to T.J.’s show as its star attraction, hoping to make lots of money off the spectacle. Things don’t go as planned— of course— because the hungry Allosaurus has other ideas, and all things being equal would rather not be part of a wild west show but instead would much prefer to break free and eat as many people as possible!

And that’s the plot of THE VALLEY OF GWANGI. The screenplay by William Bast, Julian More, and Willis H. O’Brien tells a pretty standard story, a variation of KING KONG that is much tamer than the 1933 masterpiece. The best scene in THE VALLEY OF GWANGI is the sequence where the cowboys take on the Allosaurs, but honestly, it’s awfully reminiscent of the scene in MIGHTY JOE YOUNG where the cowboys meet up with Joe.

THE VALLEY OF GWANGI has a very interesting cast. I’ve always liked James Franciscus, and as such, I’ve always felt a bit sad for him, as he was a really good actor who never seemed to get that big break. As Tuck Kirby, Franciscus is a dashing leading man, a rogue with a heart, as while he does get to speak some unintentional sexist lines of dialogue, he means well, and really isn’t as bad as he’s made out to be. In the end, he really does care about T.J.

Franciscus would go on to star in BENEATH THE PLANET OF THE APES (1970), a movie that he hoped would help him shed his pretty boy image, but the film underperformed at the box office and the success he had hoped would come from it never materialized. He also starred in the horror movie KILLER FISH (1979) with Lee Majors and Karen Black. Franciscus died in 1991. He was only 57.

Gila Golan is enjoyable here as T.J., although her lines were dubbed by another actress.

Richard Carlson of course is best known among genre fans for his work in CREATURE FROM THE BLACK LAGOON (1954) and various other horror/science fiction movies from the 1950s, including IT CAME FROM OUTER SPACE (1953).

Also in the cast is Laurence Naismith as Professor Bromley, the visiting British professor who is an expert on dinosaurs. Naismith has a resume a mile long, and also appeared in Harryhausen’s JASON AND THE ARGONAUTS (1963) and in the horror movie VILLAGE OF THE DAMNED (1960).

And Freda Jackson plays the witch who curses everybody and anybody in this movie! Jackson appeared in Harryhausen’s CLASH OF THE TITANS (1981), and my favorite Jackson role was as the crazed and dedicated Greta who spent her days and nights protecting the vampire Baron Meinster in Hammer’s classic THE BRIDES OF DRACULA (1960).

As a whole, THE VALLEY OF GWANGI is an interesting production. It was shot in Spain, with a British crew and director, and an American actor and Israeli actress in the lead roles.

That British director was Jim O’Connolly, and he doesn’t really do much here to give the film much distinction. There is one memorable sequence, the aforementioned cowboys vs. Allosaurus scene.

The best part of THE VALLEY OF GWANGI is the special effects of Ray Harryhausen, even though they are not his best work. There’s a neat battle between the Allosaurus and a styracosaurus, and another between the Allosaurus and an elephant. The film’s finale takes place inside a gigantic church, which again features nifty effects from Harryhausen. If only the Allosaurus wasn’t so colorful!

But he is. Which means, that long before Barney invaded children’s homes, Gwangi was the original purple dinosaur!

Care to give an Allosaurus a hug?

—END—

TROLL (2022) – New Netflix Giant Monster Movie Monstrously Good

My favorite part about TROLL (2022), a new giant monster movie from Norway now streaming on Netflix, is that it pays homage to the monster movies of yesteryear and gets nearly everything right about the subgenre, even as it tells a story about a giant troll.

It gets that right too, since trolls are a part of Norwegian folklore, and so the fantasy here is grounded in mythology.

TROLL also has a fabulous script by Espen Aukan, based on a story by director Roar Uthaug. It takes its monster plot seriously, while keeping the script lively and at times light, and includes references to Godzilla and King Kong. It also didn’t hurt to have a couple of characters be STAR TREK fans, and so some of the conversations are peppered with STAR TREK references that actually have bearing on the plot. So, for this STAR TREK fan, that was a lot of fun.

In short, I enjoyed TROLL more than some of the recent bigger budget GODZILLA and KING KONG movies of late.

TROLL tells the story of scientist Nora Tidemann (Ine Marie Wilmann) who is called in as a government advisor when there is an “incident” following a construction crew’s blasting of a major tunnel and there are what appear to be giant footprints in the ground leading away from the area. She is quick to point out the obvious, that they are looking at footprints, and while she can’t say what made them, she does tell the skeptical government officials that they should be looking for a creature of considerable size.

It turns out that what made them is a troll, and to help her with this situation, Nora turns to her estranged father Tobias (Gard B. Eidsvold) who is an expert on the subject but because of his intense belief in trolls has been labeled as somewhat of a crackpot. Tobias is only too happy to learn that proof of what he has been saying all his life has finally materialized, and while the government is only interested in destroying the troll, Nora and Tobias would prefer to learn more about it.

Nora gains more credence when traditional weapons fail against the troll, and her and Tobias’ expertise are again requested. Nora also gains two allies, government advisor and self-described STAR TREK geek Andreas (Kim Falck) and military captain Kris (Mads Sjogard Pettersen) both of whom come to respect Nora and value her insight on the threat.

The script nails all these characters, and everyone in this movie acts like real people, including the government officials. TROLL is not a giant monster movie where the characters are all cardboard and boring. They’re three dimensional and interesting.

And the actors all do standup jobs with their roles.

The special effects are excellent. The troll looks authentic and frightening. Director Roar Uthaug crafts some impressive giant monster scenes, some intense, some frightening, and others flat out exciting.

The back story for the troll also gives the creature plenty of sympathy. An intriguing subtext is the troll’s disdain for Christians, and the film almost takes a daring step to frame Christianity as a villain here, which would have been a gutsy and refreshing call, but the film stops short of completely developing this theme. There’s one scene in particular where a soldier is praying, and the troll can smell his blood, and that’s the soldier he targets and kills, but other than this, the topic is muted.

TROLL is available on Netflix in an English language version or in its original Norwegian language with English subtitles, which is how I saw it. Always go with the original language. As good as dubbing can sometimes be, the acting is always more natural in the original language.

If you like giant monster movies, especially those that take their subject matter seriously and know their cinematic history, you’ll love TROLL.

It’s a monstrously good time.

I give it three stars.

—END—

RATING SYSTEM

Four stars- Excellent

Three stars- Very Good

Two stars- Fair

One star- Poor

Zero Stars- Awful

IN THE SPOOKLIGHT: THE MIST (2007)

My two favorite works by Stephen King are his novel Salem’s Lot (1975), which I read when it first came out when I was eleven years old, and it scared the crap out of me, and his novella The Mist (1980).

So, when the movie version THE MIST (2007) came out, I knew it would be hard-pressed to meet my expectations because I enjoyed the novella so much, and while I generally liked the movie, I didn’t love it.

Part of this is because of my love of the novella itself, but another more important part is the movie version simply isn’t as intense as King’s original story, even with its infamous changed and much darker ending. Having re-watched the film for the purposes of this column, my opinion remains unchanged.

In THE MIST, a mysterious mist covers a small Maine town after a ferocious thunderstorm, and a group of townspeople including David Drayton (Thomas Jane) and his young son find themselves trapped inside a supermarket with giant carnivorous insects and other unseen nasties hovering outside in the fog, creatures that are not only waiting to eat people who venture outside, but also that are actively trying to break through the glass of the market and get inside.

It’s a great premise for a story.

THE MIST was written and directed by Frank Darabont, who also successfully adapted a couple of other Stephen King stories for the big screen, THE SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION (1994) and THE GREEN MILE (1999). Darabont is also the man who developed and created the TV show THE WALKING DEAD (2010-2022). THE MIST shares a common theme with THE WALKING DEAD, as both stories follow a group of survivors as they try not only to deal with the supernatural threat in their world, but also the threat from other humans who lose their sh*t when the world as they know it comes to an end. They even share some of the same cast members, as Laurie Holden (Andrea), Jeffrey DeMunn (Dale), and Melissa McBride (Carol) all have roles in THE MIST.

But THE MIST is not as intense as THE WALKING DEAD, nor is it as intense as the novella on which it is based, which has always been my problem with this movie. It’s generally enjoyable and scary, but it never really gets under your skin or goes for the throat, with the exception of its chilling conclusion. But so much before that, like the all-important sequences in the grocery store, is talky and drawn out.

The most frightening part of the movie version of THE MIST is not its monsters, but human character Mrs. Carmody, played by Marcia Gay Harden, who delivers one of the best performances in the movie. Mrs. Carmody believes the mist and its monsters have happened because her Old Testament vengeful God is angry with humanity and is exacting revenge. To appease her God, she begins to seek followers inside the supermarket, and there’s talk of offering a sacrifice to God to show him that they are faithful. This character remains frightening today as in recent years both religious and political extremism has grown more aggressive and violent.

Also memorable is character actor Toby Jones as Ollie Weeks, the supermarket employee and character audiences probably most identify with, as he is just an everyday loyal worker who finds himself stepping up and taking on a leadership role. I always enjoy Jones’ work, and his credits are too numerous to list here, but his performance is one of my favorite parts of THE MIST.

WALKING DEAD veterans Jeffrey DeMunn and Laurie Holden are also really good here in their roles, which almost seem like warm-ups for their roles on the blockbuster TV series.

Andre Braugher is fine as the annoying Brent Norton, and in the lead, Thomas Jane is okay as David Drayton, but I’ve always found his performance, with the exception of the ending, to be, like the rest of the movie, lacking in the necessary intensity. Supposedly, Frank Darabont wanted Jane to star as Rick Grimes in THE WALKING DEAD. Based on his performance here in THE MIST, I’m glad the lead role of that zombie series went to Andrew Lincoln instead.

Of course, you can’t talk about THE MIST without talking about the ending. The ending to the novella simply had the characters exiting into the mist, and their fate was left for the reader to decide, which was something that worked for me. Darabont famously changed the ending, which gives the film an incredibly dark finish, which for many fans, made this movie something extra special. Indeed, even Stephen King is on record as saying he loved the ending to the movie and wishes he had thought of it. As endings go, it is incredibly grim, and again, since I loved the entire novella so much, I prefer its original ending to the one in the movie. Let’s put it this way. It’s the ending which prevents me from wanting to watch this one over and over, as it’s such a complete downer.

But there is one positive that I took from this depressing ending as I watched the movie again here in 2022, a time when extremism is running rampant throughout the world. On the one end in THE MIST, we have the extremism of Mrs. Carmody, which is easy to see, and on the other end, at the film’s conclusion, we witness an extreme decision made by David Drayton, which at the time, seemed like the best decision, in spite of how excruciatingly painful it would be, to make. But moments after pulling the trigger— eh hem— on this decision, Drayton sees that it was so very wrong, and he falls to his knees and screams in agonized horror. So, the ending, in spite of the fact that I don’t really like it, does speak, like the rest of the film does, to the importance of avoiding extremism, whether that be extreme beliefs or actions. If Drayton and those in the car with him, had only expressed a bit more faith in humanity, their fates would have been different.

THE MIST is a well-made, frightening horror movie. For some, it’s an exceptional horror movie. For me, it remains just very good, because its source material, Stephen King’s novella of the same name, is far superior.

Either way, THE MIST is worth a look, and its ending is one you definitely need to experience at least once, and then as you walk away from the end credits, you can ask yourself, would I have done the same?

—END—

IN THE SPOOKLIGHT: GORGO (1961)

When you think of giant monster movies, you most likely think of Godzilla and King Kong, arguably the two most famous giant movie monsters of all time, and you probably think of Japan’s Toho Studios, who made so many of those Godzilla movies we love, as well as plenty of other giant monster adventures.

But today’s movie, GORGO (1961), hails from the United Kingdom, a country that historically did not churn out a whole bunch of giant monster movies. And while in some ways the plot borrows heavily from the original GODZILLA (1954), except in this case rather than Godzilla emerging from the ocean to destroy Tokyo, we have Gorgo emerging from the ocean to pummel London, GORGO is a good enough giant monster movie to stand on its own.

In fact, the special effects in this one depicting Gorgo’s assault on London are right up there with Godzilla’s more famous attack on Tokyo. Topnotch stuff! So much so, that this sequence which pretty much takes up the entire second half of the movie, ranks as one of the best monster-attacks-city sequences ever put on film! The movie is only 78 minutes long, and so at the end of the day, GORGO is one action-packed giant monster movie!

But it’s also rather odd in that it’s one of the few monster movies— or any movie for that matter— that doesn’t really feature any women! There are no female main characters, and I think there’s only two women in the film who even speak any lines of dialogue!

Then again, giant Gorgo is a female, as she is a mommy monster in search of her baby monster which gets kidnapped and taken to London. Hmm. Maybe Gorgo’s contract stipulated that she would be the only prominent female in the cast?

Anyway, GORGO is the story of Joe Ryan (Bill Travers) and Sam Slade (William Sylvester) who helm a salvage vessel, and when they discover a sea monster off the coast of Ireland, they capture it and decide to bring it back to London in order to make money off it. These guys obviously went to the Carl Denham school of business! Little boy Sean (Vincent Winter), who lives on the island where Gorgo is discovered, tells Joe and Sam that they shouldn’t capture the monster and take him away, but the adults don’t listen to him. So, Sean secretly stows away on the ship, and when Joe and Sam discover him, they decide to take care of him and pretty much adopt him for the rest of the movie. Er, Sean, where the hell are your parents?

They bring Gorgo to London where he is shown off at a circus and much to Joe and Sam’s delight, makes them lots of money. But it turns out, this is only a baby Gorgo, and when mommy Gorgo emerges from the ocean, she’s none too happy about her son being abducted, and so she swims to London and attacks the city in order to get him back.

And there’s your plot!

GORGO was directed by Eugene Lourie, who must have loved giant monster movies, because this was the fourth time he directed a movie about a giant monster! His first, THE BEAST FROM 20,000 FATHOMS (1953), is probably his most famous, as it featured the special effects of Ray Harryhausen and was based on the short story “The Fog Horn,” by Ray Bradbury. Lourie followed this up with THE COLOSSUS OF NEW YORK (1958), a film about a giant robot, and then he made THE GIANT BEHEMOTH (1959), which featured the special effects of KING KONG creator Willis O’Brien, which told the story of a yet another giant sea monster.

And then he made GORGO. Overall, THE BEAST FROM 20,000 FATHOMS is probably his best movie, mostly because it did feature the effects of Ray Harryhausen, but GORGO is a close second, and the attack on London is far more intense than any of the scenes found in THE BEAST FROM 20,000 FATHOMS.

Even more interesting, these are the only four movies Eugene Lourie ever directed! He should have directed more, because all four of these movies are very good, and two of them, THE BEAST FROM 20,000 FATHOMS and GORGO are downright excellent! Lourie passed away in 1991 from heart failure.

Robert L. Richards and Daniel James wrote the screenplay which tells a decent enough giant monster story, with the one glaring oddity being that there are no women in this story whatsoever!

Young Vincent Winter, who played Sean, would become disappointed with acting and turn to working behind the scenes where he would serve as an assistant director for many movies, including the Christopher Reeve SUPERMAN (1978). Winter died in 1998 from a heart attack at the age of 50.

Also in the cast is Martin Benson, who played the circus owner who promotes Gorgo in London. Benson is no stranger to genre films, having played doomed Father Spiletto in THE OMEN (1976), and, in the role I remember him most for, playing the weasel-like Mr. Rash in NIGHT CREATURES (1962), Hammer’s pirate adventure starring Peter Cushing and Oliver Reed. Benson also had a “pressing engagement” in the Sean Connery James Bond classic GOLDFINGER (1964), as his character ends up being crushed in a car by Oddjob.

And speaking of Hammer Films, in the scene where baby Gorgo is paraded around London, you can see Hammer’s THE MUMMY (1959) playing at the theater at Piccadilly Circus.

The impressive special effects were created by Tom Howard, who would later work on Stanley Kubrick’s 2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY (1968). Interestingly enough, the same monster suit was used for both mommy Gorgo and baby Gorgo, and the size difference was achieved with different sets and models, as well as different roar sound effects.

When GORGO was released in 1961, there had only been two Godzilla movies released, the original and its sequel GODZILLA RAIDS AGAIN (1955), but the filmmakers must have had Godzilla in mind because they premiered GORGO in Japan rather than in the United Kingdom.

Japan returned the favor by basically remaking GORGO as MONSTER FROM A PREHISTORIC PLANET (1967) (Its original and better title is GAPPA THE TRIPHIBIAN MONSTERS), a tale in which a mommy and a daddy monster attack Tokyo in order to bring back their baby monster which had been taken to Japan.

The lesson from both these movies is, if you’re going to put a young giant monster in a show, you’d best ask its parents’ permission first! You might also want to include them in the contract and give them a piece of the proceeds!

GORGO is one of the better giant monster movies of yesteryear. In spite of the dubious decision not to feature any female characters in its story other than the giant monster Gorgo herself, this one features really good special effects and a second-half giant monster assault on London that can’t be beat!

The title, by the way, comes from the Gorgon, as Gorgo is short for Gorgon, and it refers to the Medusa tale of the creature so hideous one look at her would turn people to stone. While Gorgo is not that hideous looking, the creature is indeed monstrous and is impressive to behold.

So, you don’t have to be afraid of Gorgo’s face. It won’t turn you into stone. On the other hand, you probably should be afraid of Gorgo’s feet, which will turn you into some itty-bitty pieces of crushed flesh and bone when they step on you.

—END—

Worst Movies of 2021

Welcome back! As promised, here is my list of the Top 10 Worst Movies of 2021.

As I did with my Best Movies List, I’m placing an asterisk next to this one, as once again, the pandemic has prevented trips to the movie theaters from being a safe activity, and so with this in mind, I know we haven’t all seen the same movies since we are not all heading out to the movie theaters to see the same national releases. I know there are plenty of movies I missed this year.

Okay, let’s get on with it. Without further hesitation, here is my list of the Top 10 Worst Movies of 2021:

10. CRY MACHO – probably the dullest movie I watched all year. Clint Eastwood directs and stars in this tale of a former rodeo star (Eastwood) who goes to Mexico to bring back his boss’s teenage son to the States, and along the way, the two form a bond in this underwhelming buddy movie. While I am in awe of Clint Eastwood, who at 91 years old, is still making quality movies, the story here in CRY MACHO doesn’t do him any favors. The storytelling is muddled, and Eastwood seems to be playing a character who is much younger than 91, although the script never makes this clear. Not much to like about this one, even for Eastwood fans.

9. FEAR STREET: PART TWO – 1978 – Yeah, I know. For a lot of folks, this second installment in the Netflix FEAR STREET horror movie trilogy was the best of the lot, but for me, it was the worst. Each part served as an homage to a particular horror movie genre, and here in FEAR STREET: PART TWO – 1978 that genre is the FRIDAY THE THIRTEENTH movies. I’m going to ruffle more feathers here as well when I say honestly that I’ve never liked the FRIDAY THE THIRTEENTH movies and have found them all to be particularly bad. FEAR STREET: PART TWO does a nice job capturing the feel of these movies, but at the end of the day, it’s yet another variation of teenagers at a summer camp being slaughtered in the most unrealistically gruesome of ways. If that’s your cup of tea, you probably love this movie. But it’s not mine. I prefer intelligence in my horror.

8. GODZILLA VS. KONG – Again, this is one that a lot of people really liked, but for me, even as a fan of giant monster movies, especially King Kong movies, and Godzilla movies as well, this one was simply bad. I find it difficult to understand why this movie has so many fans when its script is so weak. The human characters are all forgettable, the situations unrealistic and uninspiring, and the dialogue is pretty poor. So, all you have left are the giant monsters in combat. And even those scenes didn’t do much for me. I know the argument is out there that that’s how the old Toho Godzilla movies all were. That’s a fair argument, up to a point. What always saved the Toho films was that Godzilla and his friends all had personality. The monsters in these modern-day versions do not. Plus, movies like KING KONG (1933) and THEM! (1954) did have superior scripts. These new giant monster movies do not. Instead, the modern-day giant monster movie (mostly Godzilla and Kong these days) has been reduced to special effects only, without any interest in creating any kind of a story worth telling.

7. COMING 2 AMERICA – the original COMING TO AMERICA (1988) starring Eddie Murphy and Arsenio Hall was very funny. This sequel, in spite of the return of Murphy and Hall, is not. Next movie…

6. TYGER TYGER – this was a movie that I fully expected to like, because it was so different and quirky, with a sense of style that I thought would make it a winner. But this tale of a pair of selfless robbers who kidnap a drug addict before they all find themselves hiding out in a bizarre psychedelic city is probably better enjoyed when you’re high! Seriously! The longer this one went on, the less sense it made, and by the time it was all over, it largely had become a wasted opportunity. No pun intended!

5. THE LITTLE THINGS – in spite of the presence of Denzel Washington, Rami Malek, and Jared Leto this one just doesn’t work. Washington plays a former detective who’s called in to help with a serial killer case, and the character he plays is known for spotting the little things others miss in these cases. Trouble is, the script barely shows him doing this. Malek plays the hotshot detective who calls in Washington for help, but the choices he makes throughout the movie make him seen anything but a hotshot detective. And Leto plays the man they suspect is the serial killer. This one should have been awesome. Instead, it’s a muddled meandering tale that gets worse as it goes along with a particularly weak ending.

4. WITHOUT REMORSE- With a script by one of my favorite screenwriters, Taylor Sheridan, I fully expected to like this adaptation of a Tom Clancy novel, but instead it proved to be Sheridan’s first real misfire. Michael B. Jordan plays an elite Navy Seal who’s gone rogue to solve the murder of his wife, only to find— of course— that it’s all part of a larger conspiracy. What. A. Surprise. Yawn.

And now, the drum roll please. Here are my Top 3 Worst Movies from 2021:

3. SWEET GIRL -Hands down, the worst action movie of the year. Jason Momoa plays a man who vows revenge against a pharmaceutical company after its “business decision” pulled a drug from the market which could have saved his terminally ill wife. So, hubby goes insane and plots to kill the heads of this company, who, while they are undesirable, probably don’t deserve to be killed. So, there’s that initial problem. But wait, there’s more! There’s a larger conspiracy! Of course, there always is. Plus, Momoa’s character against his better judgement is constantly bringing his teenage daughter with him and training her to protect herself and be an assassin vigilante like him… and then, thanks to a bizarre plot twist, his character disappears from the second half of the movie. So, yes, you have an action film headlined by Jason Momoa, that halfway through ditches its star. Ugh.

2. MADRES – the worst horror movie of the year. This tale of a Mexican American couple who move to a new community in 1970s California that seems to have a weird sinister secret involving pregnant women, doesn’t know how to get out of its own way. The film aims for a ROSEMARY’S BABY (1968) and THE STEPFORD WIVES (1975) vibe but fails on both counts. This one is based on true events, and its reveal at the end is actually very good, but the problem is the film tries so hard to hide this reveal with a supernatural tale that is so lame it makes the movie completely ineffective. Had the filmmakers chosen to focus on what this film is ultimately about, it would have been a far darker, more memorable movie.

And now, drum roll please, the Worst Movie of 2021:

1. THUNDER FORCE – by far, the worst comedy of the year. Melissa McCarthy plays a woman who inherits superpowers thanks to her scientist friend played by Octavia Spencer. They then take on the world’s supervillains. Should have been funny. But it’s not. Jason Bateman fares the best as a supervillain known as The Crab. Written and directed by McCarthy’s husband Ben Falcone.

And there you have it. My picks for the Top 10 Worst Movies of 2021. Now, let’s move on to 2022.

As always, thanks for reading!

—Michael